English is absolutely the worst subject in the history of education, and is the the worst subject I’ve ever had the misfortune of studying in my entire life. Not because I find it boring (although I definitely do), but because it puts more emphasis on literature and symbolism than the things it’s actually supposed to teach.
First of all, what currently goes on in that class is just plain nuts. All the books and stories you have to read and literary symbols you have to learn cause writing and grammar to educationally take a back seat to what is essentially an hour or so of book club. Some people find the stories in English absolutely facinating, and I recognize that. So don’t get me wrong here, I’m certainly not trying to knock people for their intrests. If reading’s your thing, I say go for it. The point I’m trying to get across though, is that books are hobby, and a hobby shouldn’t be a replacement for more valuable life skills. Yes, reading skills are important, but they’re not important enought to warrant 80% or more of the class.
Also, all the over analyzing that goes on in that class is largely unnecessary. If you’re trying to make a point or ask a question, there’s better ways to do that than encoding it into an absurd scavenger hunt of allusions and symbolism that usually require large imaginative leaps. Often times I find myself thinking “My, that’s quite the dick you’re making out of that cigar, isn’t it?”
The areas where English actually has practical application (ie: being a journalist or an author) involves writing ability. You have to be able to be a good wordsmith. You have to be able to make an argument and support it well. Have you been in any English class where they actually taught this? I know I haven’t. Most of our time is spent reading and over-analyzing stories rather than developing writing skills. The only thing those courses contain that caters to its real world application are papers, which you have to write in almost any class anyways short of mathematics and maybe science, if you don’t consider the writing part of lab reports true papers. Seriously, why do they expect me to craft an eloquently worded paper without actually teaching HOW to first? Trying to teach English class with story time is ridiculous. It’s basically saying “Oh, you want to learn how to play the flute? Okay, then here’s a book of facts about penguins, with a page about finger positions at the end.” Stop making English class story time. If I wanted story time, I’d take a literature or history course. Writing is a skill, and needs to be treated as such. And like all skills, practice makes perfect.
Now, I like consider myself somewhat of a grammar Nazi. Maybe not a full blown grammar Nazi, but a Nazi sympathizer, if you will. And it really disappoints me that English classes stop teaching grammar after the 6th grade. Ever wonder why homeschooled kids sound so much smarter than public school kids? This is (partly) why. Now we have not just poor writing skills, but poor knowledge of grammar as well. In a broader sense, this means we’re essentially giving public schoolers 20 milligrams of stupid everyday. If you were being forced to take a stupid pill everyday, wouldn’t you jump at the chance to stop? I know I would. Having book club for an hour instead of learning writing and grammar is shooting yourself in the foot, as far as a career in the English field goes.
Certainly there’s nothing wrong with learning all the great works of literature, in fact, I think it’s a good thing, and makes you a more educated person. This is only fraction of what it takes to be a good writer though. It doesn’t deserve the huge majority of the class time it gets. Right now, it’s just a watered down literature class, and that’s plain retarted.
